Treehumper

According to a new report from the National Oil Spill Commission looking into the causes of the Gulf disaster, everyone involved did a super job except for one jackass in the BP marketing department.

The planet is fine, the people are fucked.

In an apparent game of one-upmanship, Republican members of Congress continue to doubt the existence of human-caused climate change. But they haven’t stopped there.

Two students visit the local recycling plant to find out how to “go green.”

The president of the low-lying island nation of the Maldives helped install solar panels on the roof of his official residence, but then apparently fled the country in the middle of the night. A panicked voice message left with the Associated Press from the president cited the fact that as a country, “the Maldives are totally fucked.”

We may need to stop burning fossil fuels, but I’ll tell you what: wind turbines? Not in my back yard, or so help me God I will fucking cut you.

Jimmy Carter’s solar panels were carted back to Washington today. Find out where they’ve been hiding out for the last 30 years or so.

In the wake of the brutal murder of any sort of climate and energy legislation in Congress late in July, many environmentalists immediately turned their attention to a next step. If Congress can’t act this year, what should be done to start a substantial draw down on emissions and to stave off the most dire effects of global warming that threatens to spiral out of control?

There are plenty of ideas out there, like… you know what? Screw it.

In a tearful press conference on Thursday, the environment said it would finally have to concede defeat at the hands of humanity.